“What I Wouldn’t Do”
By Serina Mikunda
What would I do just to feel okay?
To feel less pain, for only a day?
I would hope and wish and pray
But what would I not do?
We would do most anything to quell desperation
To feel like more than an aberration
To achieve more than adaptation
But our laser tight focus can lead us askew
Would you take meds from a loved one's drawer?
Cause suffering to someone you say you adore?
Turn into someone you would abhor?
Changing from the person you once knew?
Would you use heroin you got off the street?
Would you lie, or would you cheat?
Dig in deeper to a life of deceit?
Justifying that relief was long overdue?
I know you are feeling a lot of abandonment
Not getting much help from the medical establishment
I offer only my view, no judgement
I know you are doing the best you can do
I know what is asked of you is crazy
I know people think that you're just lazy
And your ability to see beauty is getting hazy
These urges are getting hard to subdue
Think long-term, join us in the fight
Help us shoot sparks until something ignites
We will all warm ourselves by the firelight
Warming others by the light of our virtue
Because we have all walked through the fire
And we know all too well the situation is dire
But you have the chance to lead, to inspire
Whether it happens is all up to you
Serina Mikunda is an author and activist in St. Louis, Missouri. Serina lives with Ehlers-Danlos syndrome.
Pain News Network invites other readers to share their stories (and poems). Send them to: editor@PainNewsNetwork.org.
The information in this column should not be considered as professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. It is for informational purposes only and represents the author’s opinions alone. It does not inherently express or reflect the views, opinions and/or positions of Pain News Network.